HPQ Presents Patricia Dunn and the Off The Record Unindentified Insiders

by Mr Juggles

SpyTech Truth DetectorFollowing last week’s pieces on Patricia Dunn of Hewlett-Packard (NYSE: HPQ), Dunn, board member/connoisseur of SpyTech, now has unidentified insiders justifying her actions to the press off the record. Nothing screams credibility more than unindentified insiders off the record. Keep in mind, Dunn started this controversy by violating Board members’ privacy during an internal investigation she initiated to stop Board members from leaking to the press.

Other tidbits from the article:
-“[Dunn] is deeply involved with the Conference Board’s Global Corporate Governance Research Center, and her photograph and a quote from her are featured on the center’s home page.”
-HP has a Chief Privacy Officer (CPO) who testified to Congress that “Privacy is a core HP value. As a company, HP is 100 percent committed to excellence in consumer and employee privacy.”

One caveat to this saga: Dunn is apparently quite sick and underwent surgery to address cancer at approximately the same time that this scandal was unfolding. Therefore, it seems that — while she has a track record of mediocrity — she may have been incapacitated and/or unable to fully oversee her investigation due to medical reasons. Long or Short Capital is a “compassionate critic.” We wish Patricia Dunn a speedy recovery so that she can get back to violating board members privacy at full strength with the off the record approval of unidentified insiders.

Recommendation: We expect to see large scale corporate purchases of spy technologies as a veritable cornucopia of value is created by illegally invading board member’s privacy, clearly. Likewise, we expect healthy demand for counter-intelligence equipment, as board members protect themselves. Suppliers of both techs are not at risk of disruption by cut rate ex-KGB services and suppliers, as those agents are too busy owning all of the former Soviet Union’s natural resources.

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