Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire
by Johnny DebacleFrom Carter’s Adventure, here is a list of three habits of billionaires:
- Exercise daily.
- Follow your passion.
- Read. A lot. At least two hours a day, but many said they read four or more hours a day.
This type of advice always makes us reflect back on the McSweeney’s piece, 7 Habits of Highly Successful People:
- Skiing
- Yachting
- Snorkeling
- Golf
- Polo
- Dinner parties
- Shopping
In our professional opinion, the best way to become obscenely wealthy is still the old fashioned way in 4 simple steps.
Western World Version
- Take outrageous risks with extremely high upside.
- Be the 1 out of 500 million for whom it pans out. This one is key so focus on it.
- Attribute your wealth creation to your own hard work, your own genius and the power of your business plan. Be sure to stress how your wealth was singularly made possible by your unique endowment of elbow grease, street smarts, common sense, all of which your competitors obviously lacked (proven by how poor they are compared to you).
- Buy a mega yacht and/or athletic team.
Russian World Version*
- Acquire assets illegally either from or with the help of the state. Extra rubles for seizing commodity related assets
- Kill all your rivals.
- Buy a mega yacht and/or athletic team.
* The Russian version is only 3 steps reflecting certain “efficiencies” in the Russian billionaire market.
- How to be a Mini-Baller
- The Purchasing Powerless
- I Will Teach You to Be Rich: Clean Tech Pure Play
- Clear Buy Signal for ORCL
- Discuss: Riding Segway Doubles Firm's Stock Price
Email this post
| 
Print This Post
Funny article about rich people…
This made me laugh: Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire. As many folks in usability / user experience know, don’t listen to self-reporting. People are very bad at explaining why they did something, and instead, you have to watch…
It’s funny, but I was just saying a similar thing to your Western World Version on http://www.afterreadingrichdadpoordad.com in the comment section about how Trump wants to make Americans rich.
Checking your comment on that site you stray in a wrong direction with your analogy to Netscape.
Netscape is more comparable to say, Amaranth. They had some bets that would be right, they were just too far into the future and/or at an indeterminate time in the future which they weren’t positioned to survive until.
I think Netscape had most of the right bets, the problem is that they tried to sell their product to businesses while Microsoft could give it away for free. Without income Netscape had problems competing. It makes me wonder what would happen if someone released a free Windows-clone or a free Office clone before Microsoft became the standard that all businesses seem to adhere to.
Read and Become a Billionaire in Four Easy Steps…
Blawg Review has the insane task of hosting both Carnival of the Capitalists and Blawg Review #80 today. Given the problems they had crashing their server after it choked on all the links, I think you should given them the……
[…] Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire at Long or Short Capital Tongue in cheek about becoming a billionaire. I had a little chuckle with this one. […]
http://www.endlessgibberish.com/2006/10/carnival-of-investing-45_23.html
LOL…very cool article. I need to up my risk taking factors
[…] Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire at Long or Short Capital Tongue in cheek about becoming a billionaire. I had a little chuckle with this one. […]
Let me recommend four simple steps to become a billionaire:
1. Create a business that serves a higher purpose in life. Create an educational institution or organization that resolves or makes researches for the cure of HIB or cancer.
2. Produce products or goods which has no competitor that means your institution has the monopoly of the market.
3. Associate with billionaires and seek their advice on how to attain and become a billionaire.
4. Attuned your minds to solve complex problems of business or firms. Institutionalist are willing to absorved partners in a lucrative business firms whose partner could be relied on solving complex problems.
5. Be willing to take risks in business. The greater the risk the greater is the reward.
6. Resolved to become a billionaire and attain it no matter what the consequences will be. Billionaires are people with a stick-to-itiveness attitude in life.
7. Realize that the inherent qualities of empires, royalties, dynasties and palaces are problems, risks, intricacies and ambivalence. People who realize these inherent qualties and are well trained and educated to face them will naturally become billionaires.
8. Tour and have a vacation around the world. Life is too short to procrastinate.
[…] Long or Short - Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire - This site hosts some pretty darn funny financial humor. Their are some true gems in over here… browse around. […]
You forgot the fifth. Marry a (successful) hedge fund manager. You can find them in Connecticut. According to Vanity Fayre last year, most are busy doing refits of old established houses down there, so they should be home.
[…] Information Center 882. Top 10 Ten Things Everyone Should Know About HIV 883. Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire 884. Five Grammatical Errors That Make You Look Dumb 885. 10 Requisites for […]
This post is hilarious and it has truth in it! Great post, I’ve linked it on my blog.
i like to be billionaire please help me to acommplish it.
thanks
with best regards
ernest ejezie.
[…] Long or Short Capital » Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire - Paying Dividends Since Q1R… Russian World Version* […]
[…] De “Cómo convertirse en un billonario“. […]
i am an undergarduate in an african university,studying mechanical engineering,all i think of everyday is to become a billionaire , but i am not getting the direction…………. help me out
[…] Ten Reasons to Use an Information Center 882. Top 10 Ten Things Everyone Should Know About HIV 883. Four Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire 884. Five Grammatical Errors That Make You Look Dumb 885. 10 Requisites for Professional Bloggers […]