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Dear Girl, I’m long you

I realize that, given our exploding traffic patterns, you have probably already read my colleague’s callous post. Unlike him, I think you’re cute as a button. I want to be long you, in size. Please contact me so we can make babies and live happily ever after.

Sincerely,
Mister Juggles
misterjuggles@gmail.com

P.S. I am completely serious about this.

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