This Week in Tweets for 2010-02-27

by Mr Juggles
  • Is anyone out there familiar with Freehold Capital or their reconveyance fee intstruments? If so , hit me up. #

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  1. Patrick Bateman
    February 28th, 2010 | 9:47 pm

    Juggles, do you believe this is sufficient comedic output for the nearly two month period that elapsed since the previous post?

    Tell us Senor Juggles (yoo-glays), what has happened? Admit it, you have had a child, and your life has become boring. You have become boring. Earnestly concerned with baby formula and scheming to get into the right private schools, you’ve lost all ironic capacity.

    Not as boring as the folks like me who check LoS twice a day, just in case there is a post, but pretty boring.

  2. Dead_Cat
    March 1st, 2010 | 6:28 am

    Enough with the tweets already. This is a medium created for the sole purpose of trapping vain ageing celebrities into revealing how inane they really are, exposed deliberately and with their own hand, as they clutch blindly at the zeitgeist. It is not suitable for cutting edge investment analysis.

  3. Mr. Juggles
    March 1st, 2010 | 1:58 pm

    Silence. Are you aware that I am busy creating a new natural disaster derivative and spinning it to brokers as a AAA government fund?

  4. Patrick Bateman
    March 1st, 2010 | 2:01 pm

    Now that is funny Senor Juggles (yoo-glays)!

    You could turn that into a full fledged post with not more than 10 minutes of effort

  5. Conan
    March 2nd, 2010 | 5:51 pm

    Get off your knees and quit worshipping the ground Juggles walks on. It’s like getting excited for the new digitally re-mastered Animal House DVD. Nothing has changed and the jokes are still the same, but you’re pee your pants happy. We’ll still only get tweets and other lame crap. Obviously they have abandoned this site like rats fleeing a sinking pirate ship.

    Let’s all remember the glory days; you know the skinny Elvis, not this fat bloated Elvis hugging the toilet bowl.

  6. Hans Moleman
    March 3rd, 2010 | 6:28 am
  7. Patrick Bateman
    March 4th, 2010 | 2:12 pm

    Conan, It’s true.

    LoS has become the pill-popping fat Elvis.

  8. Mr. Juggles
    March 4th, 2010 | 6:23 pm

    Sorry guys currently, I’m in prison by the SEC unable to provide witty updates on the political-economic tribulations of our time. I was of course caught selling phantom shares of Lehman to retired Baby-Boomers and soccer-moms. I share a cell with Allen Stanford who has assured me a blow job retains it’s value more than an anal salad. I have a 3-6 month sentence, after which I plan on selling some Bear Stearns bonds to some sociology college students and fleeing to Fiji.

  9. Bitchtern
    March 5th, 2010 | 11:20 am

    Let me know when you get to Fiji. I am looking for a nice place to flee too.

  10. american bandersnatch
    March 5th, 2010 | 2:55 pm

    First we lost long or short capital. Then we lost Dealbreaker. Where can one look for insight in these dark times?

  11. March 5th, 2010 | 5:34 pm


    He is a false Juggles.

    I am the true Juggles. Do not renounce your possessions and go to the compound in Fiji. It will end badly.

    Instead, renounce your possessions and come to my place in South Hampton this Summer.

  12. Patrick Bateman
    March 6th, 2010 | 2:53 pm


    What we have here is a clear case of apparent recovery. in an apparent recovery, things seem to be going well, and there is so much less to criticize.

    Plus, Juggles has simply lost his touch.

    But like I was saying, the real issue, both here at at Dealbreaker, is that there just aren’t so many hilarious mistakes being made every day.

    It just aint like the good old days, back when Bear Stearns was failing one day, and Lehman the next.


    ps. Juggles, offering a visit to your place, without even asking for a photo first, or whether her thighs touch while standing? Come now, you’re making us think that you may really have lost your touch.

    You’ll know faith has been lost when we stop joking about it, and start acting kindly towards you.

  13. Mr. Juggles
    March 8th, 2010 | 4:31 pm

    It’s not really Mr. Juggles writing these posts, you fools. Look, I can post as Mr. Juggles just as easily as anyone else. Though guilty of site abandonment, we should all lose what little remains of our collective faith in humanity if the proprietors of LoS would misspell the word “its” and/or fail to recognize that Southampton is one word.

    It has come to this: readers of the site impersonating the hosts in the comments section in the hopes of providing/deriving some morsel of amusement from a once great franchise. I for one prefer no posts at all to this one-tweet-per-month nonsense.

  14. Patrick Bateman
    March 9th, 2010 | 4:38 pm

    Hey there Fake Mr Juggles.

    Post 11 is the real Juggles. Click on the underline of his name.

    You are the fake juggles.

  15. March 9th, 2010 | 4:44 pm

    I am also the fake juggles.

  16. To The Hilt
    March 10th, 2010 | 12:29 pm

    Green shoots!!!!!

    Fake juggleses are leading indicators of real juggleses.

  17. Agent Smith
    March 11th, 2010 | 1:51 am

    Saw this movie already.

  18. March 15th, 2010 | 8:48 pm

    In case anyone is not perfectly clear on what it means for a woman’s thighs not to touch while standing, take a look at exhibit A:

  19. March 15th, 2010 | 8:49 pm

    And if that wasnt enough for you, please examine the following:

  20. Cory
    March 17th, 2010 | 1:04 pm

    This is an outrage!