Long or Short Capital

Long or Short Capital’s fiscal quarter ended on 1/31/06, and the company reported their results in a press release on their site:

Mister Juggles: “We completed a watershed first Half to our 2006 Fiscal Year. Q2’06 was our best quarter ever, thanks to the genius of management and a compensation package which continues to be heavily weighted towards long dated options in the company’s non-existent stock. We have an ever increasing amount of skin in the game so you should trust us, subscribe your friends to our site and find ways to generate more free cash flow for us which will turn into dividends for you.

We feel great about our 2nd quarter and our 1st half, and we came in at the high end of our recent guidance. We are also proud to have delivered cash earnings per a subscriberholder of negative $0.48 an increase of some sort of imaginary number over last quarter’s EPS of $Div/0. We have taken a cash hit from working capital due to our 79% quarter over quarter revenue growth. In response, we have taken the steps of sourcing advertisements from vendors with more favorable payment terms. This should lead to an opportunity for w/c to be a substantial source of cash going forward. We also enjoyed a nearly 50% increase in subscribership from 60 to between 85-90, breaking 101 at points.

Our marketing spend increased by infinity% quarter over quarter, a steep rise. Our “Project Propeller” brought in roughly 350 visits at a cash cost of $100. We expect it to continue to generate 100 hits per a quarter for 5 years, so we are looking at a visitor acquisition cost (VAC) of under $0.10 on a discounted basis.

We have transferred successfully to our new WordPress 2.0 Content Delivery Platform. And more noticeably, we have altered our storefront from longorshot.blospot.com to our new longorshortcapital.com site which is strategically located between longorshortcapitak.com and longorshortcapitam.com.”

Unaudited Financial Results for Q2’06

Income Statement

Contextual CPC Revenue $116.37

Static Ad Revenue $66.91

RSS + Referral Revenue $12.02

Total Revenue $195.30

Cost of Sales $55.00

Marketing Expense $100.00

Operating Income $40.30

Balance Sheet

Cash $29.69

Accounts Receivable $132.64

Inventory $0.00

Prepaid Hosting $45.00

Accounts Payable $0

Cash Flow Statement

Operating Cash Flow ($42.52)

Capex $0.00

Distributions $X.00

Performance Metrics

Visits 7,639

Pageviews 11,093

Clicks on ads 175

Ad impressions served ~42,703

Subscribers by Email 30

Subscribers by XML 55

Inbound Links per Technorati 60

Inbound Links per Google ~16 sites

“Readers are to submit questions by email to misterjuggles or in the comments section below the post; if we get enough questions and of enough quality we will post a quarter end conference email/chat thing that will allow all of the sell-side analysts out there to fill out their models with the really important metrics like ARPU, maintenance capex spend and whiskeys per post. We will answer all questions provided they inspire humor. Our updated dividends will be announced later this week, as soon as tomorrow, if JD wakes from of his alcohol induced slumber.”