Chunnel to Nowhere

by Mr Juggles

This Chunnel tastes deliciousBuilding on the phenomenal success of the European Chunnel, government planners are coming up with more ways to inventively throw citizens’ money at a hole in the earth. In addition to the Turkish “chunnel” known as Marmamray, we have this development:

In recent months [the] governments of Morocco and Spain have taken significant steps to move forward with plans to bore a railroad under the muddy bottom of the Strait of Gibraltar. If built, the project would rank among the world’s most ambitious and complex civil engineering feats, alongside the Panama Canal and the Channel Tunnel between Britain and France.

Consider some of the benefits of the proposed Spain-Morocco chunnel :

  • The Spain-Morocco project is more ambitious than the Chunnel, which was famously delayed, over-budget, and ended up on the verge of bankruptcy. To paraphrase analrapist Tobias Funke: “These huge public works tunnels that cost tens of billions never work. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but…. but it might work for us!
  • The tunnel will connect a Muslim nation to a Christian continent, making it easier for religious dissidence to spread explosively. It’s REreconquista time!
  • Relatedly, this project will greatly increase the demand for TSA types who will be needed to inspect the cars, buses, and camels who travel through the tunnels.
  • Private investors who lost money on the Chunnel project will have their chance to recoup Chunnel losses and hit it big in the underwater tunnel investment market.

Recommendation: Long planes, Short chunnels, especially those linking Turkey to anything but mashed potatoes and gravy.

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