Killer African Frog LEAPS

by Johnny Debacle

As reported by the SF Chronicle, killer African frogs are leaving a wake of death and destruction not seen since my NHL 95 days on the Sega Genesis.

No one knows for sure when the African clawed frogs got into the pond or who put them there. But there they are, and the Toad Warriors have pretty much taken care of the native turtles, frogs and fish.

“They’ve eaten everything they can get their mouths around, and now they’re eating each other,” said Eric Mills of the animal rights group Action for Animals.

Mills worries that the fiendish amphibians — which grow to 5 inches in length and have claws on the toes of their oversize hind feet — may jump the pond and spread their reign of terror across other Bay Area waterways, although so far, none has popped up elsewhere.

Are they the real deal or just another hyped “killer African” mania like those bees that apparently aren’t that “killer” and won’t migrate north of Texas?

Recommendation: One look at this albino Grimace-looking killer gives an investor all the due diligence he or she needs to state unequivocally that these killer African frogs can produce killer returns. We recommend loading up on killer African frog LEAPS. A catalyst for hopping out of a a long position would be the moment “Killer Frogs” appear on the cover of Time Magazine.

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