Domino’s Mutant Brooklyn Style Pizza

by Mr Juggles

Domino’s has gotten attention for their release of their “Brooklyn Pizza,” roiling the the Late Night Drunk/Stoned snacks and meals market. The pie was made by reverse engineering a genuine Brookyln pizza, taking the knowledge gained from that process, and completely ignoring it. The chief Domino’s Korean geneticist then spliced the DNA from Domino’s thin crust with the DNA of their regular crust pizza to form a new hybrid pizza which possesses both “thin crust” and “regular” attributes. The resulting mutant attribute is mainly “mediocre.”

This type of immoral endeavor has been a hallmark of the company since it first adopted the Noid, a Nietzsche-visioned version of Satan as their mascot.

Ignoring the questions of morality (as we often do), there is also a question of whether this was just a ploy to distract the American consumer from remembering that the company tried to sell him pooplets.

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