The Prince of Papers, Now a Frog

by User Submitted

Submitted by LoS reader Charlie

As a college student ten years ago, I fell in love with the Wall Street Journal (NYSE: DJ). A black-and-white broadsheet sans frivolity, it was the keeper of reporting and editorial standards that put all others to shame.

Alas, times have changed.

On a flight out of New Mexico on Friday, I had a chance to read my colorful, downsized copy front to back—and learn afresh what a turd this paper has become. On the banner atop the front page: “Record Home? A $125 Million Listing in L.A. W1.” Hmmm…that story was actually on W8.

In the lead article, we get the inside scoop on the fall of Don Imus. “The reaction moved at warp speed as the Internet circulated his racist words to millions of PC screens,” the authors tell us.

And regarding the press conference featuring the Rutgers basketball players: “Without a hint of professional polish, their remarks came across as heartfelt.”

Racist? Heartfelt? Is the front page still for news, or did the trio of female reporters (dare I say dunder-headed ho’s) somehow hijack it for their editorial purposes? Tell you what: you folks stick to the facts, and let us decide what’s racist and what’s heartfelt.

Later in the article, we learn what “a American Express spokeswoman says.” Well what did the copy-editor say? Was it the same guy who edited the story on the departure of Monster’s CEO? (“Mr. Pastore’s couldn’t be reached for comment.”) Or the Naomi Schaefer Riley column on the Taste page? (“The problem is not their own dependency but their willingness to let other depend on them.”)

I once adored you, you mangled beast. Short this stinker.

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  1. Adam
    April 25th, 2007 | 2:00 pm

    Exhibit 2: On the top page of – Act One: Owning Pets, Hairy but Worthwhile

    An inane yet stupid account of why owning a pet in the city while trying to be a professional can be an expensive and troublesome experience for those people who are merely under-30.

    ” Brian McCord, 28, says he’s come to a stage when he can manage the responsibility of having a dog. “You don’t get a day off. You have to go outside and walk the dog multiple times a day… and when you’re actually out there in the snow at minus seven at 6:00 in the morning, you’re like, ‘good God, I would do anything not to have to walk this dog,'” ”

    This article is also home to the touchingly retarded account of a “27-year-old production designer” whose dog eats a bone whole, which needs to be removed, and then continues to eat a pound of chocolate in the back seat of a car on the way to the vet. This of course, isn’t such a great thing for a dog which continues to throw up violently. Fortunately for our wee 27-year old hero, she has been to the vet several times with similar ailments and the vet takes pity on her.

    What a great story and truly befitting the front page of the WSJ.

  2. Bitchtern
    April 28th, 2007 | 5:03 pm

    Is there anything better around?

  3. Charlie McDanger
    April 30th, 2007 | 11:33 pm

    Forbes, Economist, um…USA Today.