Totally Rad Mini-baller Ski Lingo

by Kaiser Edamame

A few mini-ballers went skiing over break and met some stoners in the gondola who taught them all some coloradical ski lingo. Of course the mini-ballers were enthralled with this new vocabulary and proceeded to overdose on the new found choices piece of diction. A brief guide in case you want to “make some convo” on the lift this year.

Shred the gnar – ski/ride in a totally sweet way. “Yo bra, we shredding the gnar today or what?” (can also use “shred the gnar-gnar” for additional emphasis on how much gnar you intend to shred)

Gnar-buckets (n.) – the receptacle for the gnar after you shred it. “Bra, I filled up like 6 gnar-buckets working my boards on that glade”

Hit the freshy pow-pow – Ski/ride in new-fallen snow. “Wake up kid, you looked outside yet? We’re gonna totally hit the freshy pow pow today!”

Sesh it up – definition unknown but if asked this the answer is always “yeah man”. “Did you sesh it up that time?” “Yeah man.”

Over-Under – a game skiers play whereby one skies under the other’s legs. “Dude over-under looks kinda gay but it’s actually pretty gnar”

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Comments

  1. gnartard
    January 16th, 2008 | 3:56 pm

    I think “Sesh it up” has something to do with having a good “session” which refers to some indeterminate amount of skiing/boarding (a run? a day? a series of jumps/tricks?)

    I’d love to hear how mini-ballers are incorporating this lingo into their everyday lives. I’m sure we’ll see an article soon on “Shredding the Gnar at Goldman.”

  2. January 16th, 2008 | 4:31 pm

    I think sesh might refer to a different type of session, or perhaps a risky mixture of two.
    Also – agree on implementing this in off-the-slopes environments. For example – with all the money I made in this trading sesh I got two chickenheads to let me fill their gnar buckets with some freshy pow pow while they were over-under.

  3. born to lose
    January 16th, 2008 | 5:38 pm

    this is the reason i’m always pushing people off of chairlifts.

  4. Jesus...
    January 16th, 2008 | 6:25 pm

    you guys sound like suburban white kids trying to be black. Leave the stoner ski talk to people with dreads and no knowledge of excel.

    P.S. – you also forgot sticky gnar gnar, dumpage, and extremely radicalicious*

    *1991 speak

  5. bfellows
    January 17th, 2008 | 12:10 am

    heard on the lift: give hugs not drugs

  6. who-what
    January 17th, 2008 | 8:41 am

    @ Jesus – apparently you’ve never been skiiing before. not a lot of people with dreds ski. it’s mainly white yuppies and their stoner kids. good effort though.

  7. youknowyouloveit
    January 17th, 2008 | 9:14 am

    PLUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

  8. steve
    January 17th, 2008 | 9:34 am

    you forgot my favorite backcountry guide saying:

    watch out for hidden treasure, aka, watch out for those invisible rocks buried by 1″ of snow that will eat your knees.

  9. uhh
    January 17th, 2008 | 11:51 am

    sesh it up = smoke dank nugglets

    Don’t you guys know anything?

  10. homer
    January 17th, 2008 | 1:56 pm

    I believe correct term is “danky pow-pow”, and the “sesh it up” reference is the fat joint they woulda smoked in the “gan-jola” had they not been sharing the ride up with a buncha Wall St. “gapers” like you guys.

  11. planksnotbanks
    January 17th, 2008 | 3:33 pm

    The original terms are correct and “danky” pow-pow doesn’t exist since the best powder is light in density, and dankness traditionally implies a high density of quality, which is nonsensical when applied to pow in a positive or superlative sense. cf. Tahoe cement, blower pow.

    Rad has largely been replaced by “sick.”

    Gaper is no longer much in use – beater is the preferred term.

  12. planksnotbanks
    January 17th, 2008 | 3:38 pm

    Also, re: sessions. The term is ambiguous but repetition is a necessary part. So, one run or hit or gap or jib does not a session make. Smoking obviously can be referred to this way but, on the slopes, the term doesn’t imply that smoking took place.

    It would held credibility if you got a goggle-tan before using these terms. Bonus points for the chinstrap tan line.

  13. Matt
    January 17th, 2008 | 5:52 pm

    “New” vocabulary?

    What fucking rock have you retards been hiding under?

    Vail ski bums have been talking like that for about 20 years.

  14. right
    January 17th, 2008 | 7:31 pm

    “…over break”?

    This confirms my ongoing suspicion that you chaps are still in school. Get a job already.

  15. January 18th, 2008 | 10:43 am

    ““…over break”?

    This confirms my ongoing suspicion that you chaps are still in school. Get a job already.”

    “…chaps”?

    This just confirms our new suspicion that you, g’vnor, are from Victorian England. Don’t worry, when we finish prep at Andover and matriculate to Ivy league schools, after all that, we promise to get jobs.

    Regards,
    Class of 2009

  16. January 18th, 2008 | 11:11 am

    I resent that. I will not get a job anytime this decade. I’ve got a trust fund and am pulling in a cool $300 a month from this blog.

  17. tima
    January 23rd, 2008 | 9:11 am

    Then I will feel much better about actually asking that my dividend be paid out this quarter