Foreign Exchange Rates for Australian Humans

by Johnny Debacle

Do you like my shirtUpdating our foreign exchange rates for humans based on some movemements in the spot market:

  • One 24yo Aussie surfer’s life (assets and non-financial liabilities only) = $60,000 AUD

From eBay:

Winning bidder will take ownership of my:
– Name
– Phone number
– All my possessions which includes the following
– Clothes,
– Roughly 300 CDs
– Surfboard
– Laptop (minus certain information with my discretion),
– Pushbike (Has wonky handlebars, may need some work)
– Books,
– Bed
– CD player
– Backpack
– Tennis racquets
– Golf Clubs(which you will have no idea how to use)
– Childhood photos
– Skateboard
– Nice lamp which your ex-girlfriend bought you.

– I will teach you my skills which include the following
– Surfing (Expert)
– Climbing (Intermediate)
– Skateboarding (Novice)
– Handstand Skills (Expert)
– Fire Twirling Skills (Intermediate)
– Devil Stick Twirling (Expert)
(Plus many more)

– Will introduce to all my friends & potential lovers (around 8 which I have been flirting with)
– I have around 15 close friends and around 170 other friends
– I have 2 nemeses.

Recommendation: We are bullish on the 24yo Aussie and expect trading levels to increase to a target of $120,000 AUD. Past that point we think the market will push back due to the lack of clarity in this footnote of the prospectus:

There is some tension with a former ex from a painful breakup which must be inherited.

Those kinds of liabilites can be extremely deleterious to asset values and are notoriously difficult to quantify.

Edit 1/22/07: Auction is down to $7k AUD with 7 hours left on it.

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