Mexican Cocaine Producers Bumping the Shark

by Johnny Debacle

It seems that the Mexican cocaine industry has responded to Chilean cocaine producers’ efforts to win the 2010 Copa della Coca. Mexicans responded to the Chileans’ cocaine baggage by smuggling cocaine in sharks.

The Mexican Navy says it has seized more than a tonne of cocaine hidden inside the carcasses of frozen sharks.

Armed officers found slabs of cocaine inside more than 20 sharks aboard a freight ship in the Gulf coast port of Progreso in Yucatan state.

Recommendation: We still think Chile’s creativity and ability to craft “the beautiful coca”, makes them the odds on favorite for the 2010 Copa della Coca, but you can’t count out Mexico or Bolivia. Perennial favorite Colombia is likely to have an off year, but it will come down to the draw.

Author’s note: This story was especially personal for me and difficult to write. As many of you may know, my Mexican grandfather was smuggled into this country in a shark in 1952. That experience would go on to shape his entire life. When he was young, before the shark experience, he was gregarious, charming, the kind of hombre who could saunter into a room and turn it into a fiesta. But after being smuggled in a shark, he was much darker and he’d often drift off into thought mid-sentence, never to return…as if swallowed by a shark. When we’d go to the beach, sitting enjoying churros, his mood would change as soon as I approached the water. “Don’t get eaten by any sharks, Johnny! If you do you’ll never be the same!” he’d shout warningly at me as I stepped into the ocean. I blame that shark for why I never really knew my grandfather.

HT to FuManChu

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Comments

  1. June 22nd, 2009 | 1:29 pm
  2. June 22nd, 2009 | 1:51 pm

    I was sent that at 7am on June 17th by the HTee, and I forwarded it on to JD that morning, and he drafted up that afternoon. I didn’t see it on DB until now (maybe JD did that plagiarizing Mexican). HT to FuManChu stands!


    from FuManChu
    to misterjuggles@gmail.com
    date Wed, Jun 17, 2009 at 7:05 AM
    subject Cocaine Sharks — Long or Short Capital contact form

    hide details Jun 17 (5 days ago)

    Reply

    Follow up message

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8104397.stm

    Can’t think of anything nearly witty enough for a submission, but sure you
    guys can do something with it.”

  3. June 22nd, 2009 | 5:28 pm

    You guys need to really reduce your lead times, that’s just totally unacceptable (said the guy who’s been working on his last post for 2 weeks…)

  4. June 22nd, 2009 | 5:43 pm

    We just don’t want to bunch stuff up too much, and I made the executive decision to let Piratery Corp’s transcript breathe a bit.

  5. FuManChu
    June 23rd, 2009 | 5:57 pm

    Mr Juggles even very kindly sent me an email saying the info had been passed on. I guess it was just that traumatic for JD to put electronic pen to the etheric paper that it took so long.

    Adds extra spice to the fins when we get our hands on them too.

  6. longk
    June 24th, 2009 | 8:45 am

    you would like to think that as a wise person of mexican descent you would be better able to make the kinds of decisions that lead to shark smuggling than a rich white man